007. [Video]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[It's not uncommon for Wrath to be sharing screentime with his Pokemon, but in this case, he looks distinctly irritated about it.]

[Behind him is a Lopunny that's a good foot or so taller than him, clad in a dress that is... DAMN FANCY-LOOKING, ACTUALLY. There's like... frills and ribbons and junk.]

[Wrath glares directly into the camera, appealing to the hypothetical audience to side with him.]</sub>

She wasn't gonna be happy until Mama and I bought her a DRESS.

And she's still not happy!

Why does she like clothes so much?

Pokemon don't even need to wear clothes like people and things that look like people do.

I wish I was a Pokemon, because then I wouldn't need to wear clothes.



<sub>[The Lopunny-- a recent acquisition from the raid he'd performed with Ralph of a wealthy socialite's all-night dinner party, aka Wrath's first Real Mission (tm)-- lets out a huff and taps her long, curved claws impatiently on her arm. She clearly is about as pleased to be paired with Wrath as he is with her.]

[He responds with a huff of his own.]</sub>

Hmph.

Anyway, she's brown.

So her name is Dirty.

_{[The rabbit Pokemon's head whips around, outraged, but Wrath yells right over her angry growl.]}

I DON'T CARE, DIRTY!

Comments

[armoredsoul]

[...WRATH.]

She won't like you any better if you call name her that, you know.

[garbagechild]

So?

I don't need to make her like me.

I already have Pokemon that like me.

Like Sleepy. Sleepy likes me.

[armoredsoul]

But if you intend to keep her, you have a responsibility to take care of her. And a big part of that is treating her kindly. She might not like you right now, but you can build up that trust with her.

[envy_the_sinners]

If you call her "Dirty," she will never warm up to you.

[garbagechild]

So?

I ALREADY have Pokemon that like me.

Anyway, I don't like her EITHER.

[envy_the_sinners]

You will have a much easier time if you are civil to her. Then she will likely give you civility in return.

[video]

[awesmazings]

[...wow that name.]

Weell...have you tried talking to her and asking what it is she wants in particular? Maybe with a psychic type or somethin' that could translate for you? Maybe it wasn't the right kind of dress or something...

And...are you really gonna call her Dirty?

[video]

[garbagechild]

I DID! She wanted a dress.

So we s-- bought her a dress! It was even the one she pointed to.

She's obviously NEVER gonna be happy.

And yes.

Yes I am.

[video]

[awesmazings]

Maybe she...doesn't like her name? I have a Lopunny too, and I gave mine a sweet name...like Honey! Maybe you could try something like that instead...?

[islandshore]

[Riku tries not to laugh, but a chuckle still sneaks out of him. He cracks a wry smile, trying his best to hide his amusement.]

Hey, what's wrong with clothes?

[This kid's something else.]

[garbagechild]

They're annoying, and hard to keep track of! And humans are really weird about them.

Like, wooly tubes fit on all KINDS of things. But if you put them on your hands or ears, everybody goes 'eeeuuuhhh socks are for feet!'

They're nice when it's cold but I think they're probably more trouble than they're worth most of the time.

[kingofthetvworld]

[Hearing someone badmouth clothes of all things, Teddie had to jump on the gear. Had to. As in, he would somehow die if he didn't express his MILD IRRITATION.]

Huh?! What the heck are you talking about, clothes are the best thing about...anything! You shoulda seen Cho-chan when she just got a pair of socks.

[As if on cue, a cubchoo head proceeds to squeeze into the feed and against her trainer's face, as if trying to push him out of it. That is by far the prettiest dress she's ever seen, not to mention all the proof she needs that dresses for pokemon exist. She wants it. She needs it. Teddie, in a rare moment of understanding, tries desperately to take control back from the tiny ice bear.]

So, uh, where'd you get that dress anyhow?

[garbagechild]

_{[Wrath lets out a huff, but Teddy does have a point.]}

Well, okay, socks are all right. But only when it's cold.

I don't know why anybody would wear them any other time.

<sub>[HMPH.]

[But at the question, Wrath shrugs.]</sub>

Um, a store I guess?

I didn't look at the name.

_{[Mostly because he... hadn't actually 'bought' it. More like straight-up stole it.]}

[audio]

[stonebones]

Stilzchen sometimes wears a sash, like I do...

[It had weirded him out at first, too.]

Maybe...it just makes them feel better. You probably have things you don't have to do but that make you happy, right?

[audio]

[garbagechild]

... Well. I guess I don't really need pudding cups.

But they do make me happy.

... But, that's still real different from clothes! You can't eat clothes.

_{[A pause.]}

...Or... well... you can, but people will yell at you.

[video]

[rocketralph]

_{[Here is a sound Wrath probably doesn't hear often. Or quite possibly hasn't heard at all ever. That sound is Ralph snickering at his teammate's dismay.]}

[video]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Gosh, Ralph, why do you have to be such a bad guy all the time?]

[FORTUNATELY, it kind of flies right over Wrath's head. For some reason, he seems to have gotten the impression that Ralph is NICE. Probably because Wrath takes first impressions and clings to them like a dog with a bone.]</sub>

Ralph!

Ralph, why does she like clothes so much?

Why does ANYBODY like clothes so much?

I'm confused.

video

[failnought]

[ Schoolteacher, meet child. Child, meet schoolteacher with a very stern expression. Arms folded, frown, everything. ]

You know, that's not a very nice name to call her.

video

[garbagechild]

_{[Schoolteacher, meet UNDEAD HELLBABY who has never had a day's traditional schooling in his life.]}

So?

It's accurate.

I'm just being honest.

[fairy_tale_trainer]

Do you have any psychic pokèmon that might help you understand her a bit more? Some kind of pokèmon should be able to help both of you come to an understanding.

[garbagechild]

I understand her just fine!

We just HATE each other.

That's all.

[video]

[exeggutorhead]

[Envy has started to notice a theme in Wrath's Pokemon's nicknames. When it had just been a few of them and he hadn't been paying much attention, it had been harder to catch on, but the last few have made enough of an impression to be memorable.]

[Hungry, Mad, Sleepy, Jelly, and now Dirty of all things (Envy's not too sure that the double meaning was intentional there)...]

[Some more questioning is in order here. If he just makes Wrath mad, he might get something out of him!]

Wow, if you hate her enough to name her after dirt, why not let her go?

[video]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[GOLD STAR FOR ENVY. He's the first to pick up on what just might be a thing.]

[Wrath's expression darkens into the customary glare that he greets Envy with every time they speak.]</sub>

I can't do THAT!

She'd probably rat me out.

You can't let potential traitors just go.

_{[You can thank Dante for saddling Wrath with THAT little nugget of wisdom.]}

video;

[pipers_son]

Well, folks like all sorta things that they don't exactly need. I mean, ha! That's entirely the reason why my circus stays up and runnin'.

[...And yeah he feels a bit bad for that Lopunny. Soooo-]

Y'know, if ya don't like her, and she ain't warmin' up a you, I wouldn't mind takin' her off yer hands.

[He's a bleeding heart like that.]

video;

[garbagechild]

_{[Joker's awful kind to make the offer, but Wrath shakes his head fervently.]}

I can't let her go.

She's gotta stay.

_{[Because HAHA SHE WAS STOLEN AND SHE'S SEEN WAY TOO MUCH.]}