garbagechild | 004. [Video/Action for Rocket HQ]

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004. [Video/Action for Rocket HQ]

_{[There are plenty of newborn Pokemon that enter the world squalling or cooing.]

[This one entered with a whole lot of growling and then nearly took somebody's finger off.]

[The little Deino on the screen, which happens to have a faintly-sparkling green coat rather than the customary blue, is yanking and worrying at the end of one of the scarves that its trainer had received for Christmas as well as the egg it had just hatched from. It's been in the world outside its eggshell for about five minutes and it's already filled with fury at the fact that this long soft thing exists in its general vicinity.]

[Wrath is thrilled.]

[He turns to the camera (which is presumably held by his Kangaskhan) proudly, apparently unconcerned that the tiny dino-dragon is nearly tugging the scarf right off of him.]}

The rock turned into a sparkling animal!

Her name is Mad.

Mad likes to bite.

_{[... A little like her trainer, actually. They also share the same hairdo aesthetic. This is clearly a match made in heaven.]}

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_{[It's TOTALLY absurd. But yeah-- the only human food Wrath had any experience with had quite literally just been MEAT. Fresh-caught fish yoinked from the Elrics' campfire and, later, juicy, equally-fresh barbeque.]

[And then Envy had shown up and ruined everything, and Wrath's stint trying to live like a human had ended there.]

[Needless to say, there are LOTS of different kinds of human food and every single one of them is a brand new experience.]

[He trots along at Greed's side perfectly willingly, holding the Deino like a stuffed animal.]}

Can we get food for Mad too? She didn't like the carrots I brought her earlier.

I don't like carrots either, though.

That's another way Mad and me are alike.

Of course.

[Deinos probably eat meat or something, right? He's not sure if a bakery would have much in the way of delicious things for a carnivore, but maybe it'll have a ham sandwich or something.]

I'm sure the place has something nice for Mad to eat, and I'm not gonna make you eat carrots.

_{[No one's forced Wrath to eat anything yet, and it's good to know that it won't start with his new buddy Darius! Wrath beams chipperly as he walks along. AND THEN STARTS TO CHATTER.]}

Good!

Carrots aren't tasty at all.

They're also orange.

Orange isn't a tasty color, unless it's actually an orange.

Did you know that orange is both a color AND a fruit?

I found that out awhile ago!

Actual orange fruits are pretty good.

[Naturally, these are all things he knows about, though he likes carrots. Still, he's trying not to be a condescending dickbag to Wrath because someone has to keep an eye on the kid.

If the other homunculi won't do it, he will.]

Is it, now? Learn something new every day.

Oranges are pretty tasty. Did you know there are different kinds of oranges?

_{[He shakes his head.]}

Nuh uh!

Are there really?

Do they taste different?

Kind of, yeah. There's a type called blood orange. Sounds spooky, but it's just the color. It looks red on the inside.

They're pretty tasty.

Blood orange?

Do they taste like blood?

I've tasted blood before.

It's okay.

[...he's tasted blood, too. Multiple times.

That's what happens when you're reckless as hell and haven't quite mastered using your Shield yet.]

Nah, nothing like that. They taste a lot like regular oranges.

[Maybe he should have acted horrified about a small child saying he's tasted blood before. Whoops!]

_{[Judging by his incredibly liberal attitude with regards to the information he shares, Wrath hasn't even remotely begun to develop a sense of what normal people are or aren't horrified to hear yet. FORTUNATELY FOR GREED.]}

Oh, then I'd probably like them.

Oranges are great.

Meat is my favorite, though.

Do you like meat, Dar-yus?

It comes from animals.

[This is very good.

Greed's safe for a little while longer!]

'Course I like meat. Hamburgers and hotdogs, and steak too.

I've had hot dogs!

My friend Ralph says they taste like they're probably made of real dogs. They're pretty tasty, so he's probably right.

_{[Wrath may or may not have missed the point of why Ralph was sarcastically saying they were made of real dogs.]}

[...Wh-]

Kid, I think your friend was joking.

[Otherwise he's going to have to be putting together a shit list of people lying to children in a hurry.]

... Oh.

_{[Sounds like that honestly had not occurred to him.]}

Maybe he was. He does that sometimes.

_{[Now he's frowning, though.]}

But if they're not made of dogs, why are they called hot dogs?

[That is actually a good question.]

You know, I really don't know. Maybe it's slang.

[He pats Wrath on the shoulder, smiling.]

Guess I'll have to find that one out.

Okay!

Tell me if you do.

Cuz now I'm hungry and curious!

[That makes him smirk.]

Y'know, we could go for hot dogs instead.

_{[Wrath's eyes widen.]}

--Really?

CAN we?!

_{[OH BOY]}

[Greed already has developed a nasty habit of being unable to say no. This just makes it worse.]

Come on, I know a place. It's not far.

[And indeed it's not. Greed leads Wrath to a small, quiet diner.]

Try not to harass the patrons too much.

_{[It doesn't help that Wrath is pretty damn hard to say no to.]

[Pleased as punch, Wrath bobbles along after Greed until they get to the diner, at which point he lingers by the door a little. He's been to diners before-- post-mission refueling sessions. But he's also gotten kicked out of at least one for disruptive behavior.]

[Orders is orders, though, so Greed's suggestion is all he needs as permission to enter.]

[He scrambles over to one of the stools by the counter, climbing onto it.]}

Can we get the soft yellow twigs, too?

_{[.... he's talking about french fries.]}

[You know, Greed considers this a very good day. He can't say no to the kid, sure, but he'll work on that eventually. Until then, Greed's fairly pleased with the situation. This way he can get to know Wrath a little more and keep an eye on the kid for the rest of the homunculi, and he can keep an eye on the kid himself, something he honestly prefers without his old eyes and ears.

He watches carefully to see the kid settling down. He's good at following orders, and while that might be Dante's fault, Greed can't help but feel a little grateful for it right now.]

...soft yellow twigs?

[Greed's brows raise as he sits down next to Wrath, and it's a moment before he smiles, realizing what the kid's talking about.]

Sure, of course.

_{[Dante might have done a lot of damage, but well, it had made him somewhat easier to handle if you knew what you were doing.]

[Which Greed, being one of the oldest of them all, does.]

[The boy grins broadly when his request is okayed. If he were a dog, his tail would be wagging. He sets the growling Deino down in his lap like a stuffed animal and brushes his hair back a little so that the Zubat perched on his head has more room to sit.]}

I like those things.

They're salty and taste much better than the kinds of twigs you find outside.

[...the implication of Wrath eating twigs isn't lost on Greed.]

They're much better for you than the twigs you find outside, too.

[Because they're actually food. Homunculi can't get away with eating nothing here in Johto after all.]

_{[HEY, HE SPENT AT LEAST A FEW WEEKS RUNNING AROUND NAKED ON AN ISLAND. THERE WERE A LOT OF THINGS THAT WENT INTO HIS MOUTH THAT SHOULDN'T GO INTO MOUTHS!]}

Good!

I bet Mad will like them.

She's a baby so she needs soft things. Right?

[...honestly that thing looks like it prefers meat, but he doesn't think that Mad will be picky. At least his own Pokemon never are.]

Sure, I'm sure she'll appreciate the food.

004. [Video/Action for Rocket HQ]

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