002. [Video/Action for Goldenrod-- backdated to Christmas morning]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Guess who has no idea what Christmas is, and also can't read worth a damn and therefore has no idea where either of the packages he got came from?]

[THIS KID!]</sub>

GHROOOOO!

Put your head down, Mama, show the screen machine your bow and hat!

<sub>[A very proud-looking Kangaskhan face pops in front of the camera-- with a long navy-blue scarf tied neatly around her neck in a bow as fancy as a pair of eight-year-old hands can manage.]

[... And there's also a big fluffy sweater on top of her head. The sleeves are pulled over her ears.]

[After everybody's gotten a great look at Mama's sweet new outfit, Wrath's head wiggles into the frame, looking even messier than in his first video, if that's even possible. ... There's another sweater with its sleeves tied around his forehead like a headband.]

[Pretty much the whole screen is dominated by their faces, but judging by the snowflakes stuck in Wrath's hair and the wool of the scarf and sweaters, they're outdoors somewhere.]</sub>


Look! Look, see, how she's even prettier!

Comments

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

Anybody ever tell you how to work a sweater, kid?

[Blake takes a second, long look.]

Or a comb?

[action]

[quickattackjack]

<sub>[What a wonderful Christmas! Jack is out enjoying the weather with Holly and Nightshade, his Skiddo duo, trotting along on either side of them. And so it comes to pass that he happens upon the boy and his monster mother and their unique fashion statements.]

[He pauses, takes his chin in his hand, and tilts his head.]

What an interesting idea!</sub>

[video]

[garbagechild]

What's a sweater?

_{[Like, he recognizes his gift as being an article of clothing, and can REASONABLY construe where the sleeves are supposed to go, but he's never actually heard anybody use the word 'sweater' before.]}

[action]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[YES IT IS A WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS.]

[... WHATEVER CHRISTMAS IS.]

[Wrath is perched on the Kangaskhan's shoulders now, hanging onto the sleeves dangling off of her ears like reins.]

[She looks over at the sound of Jack's voice and bobs her head respectfully. YES IT IS AN INTERESTING IDEA, isn't her trainer just so creative? Children are delightful.]</sub>

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

That thing on your-- [Blake stops.] You're pulling my leg, right?

[video]

[garbagechild]

--how can I do that, you're in the screen machine, not here with me!

_{[MONSTER CHILD FAILS TO UNDERSTAND MODERN COLLOQUIALISMS: NEWS AT 11]}

[quickattackjack]

_{[Jack takes that as the go-ahead to approach. He strolls up to them, grinning broadly.]}

I couldn't help but notice the way you're wearing your sweaters! What do you call this style?

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

It's an expression, kid.

[Blake rubs his face, wondering what he's stepped into here.]

You see those long arm-shaped things on top? Those are for your arms.

[garbagechild]

<sub>[WHY HELLO THERE OLD MAN!]

[Wrath looks sort of baffled by the question. STYLE WASN'T REALLY WHAT HE WAS THINKING ABOUT WHEN HE PUT THE CLOTHES ON, but... it's actually something to think about! What style is it?]

[He'd dressed Envy-style before.]

[But Envy's a traitor. And Wrath refuses to look up to him anymore.]

[Maybe it's time to have his own style. Yeah!]</sub>

I call it-- ... I call it...

Rage!

_{[A pause.]}

... Like... it's.... it's all the rage.

_{[.... SHRUG?]}

[video]

[garbagechild]

... Well I know that, but they're also really good for tying in knots.

_{[He points this out with a slightly affronted-sounding huff. Gosh, mister, do you think he's STUPID?]}

private video

[envy_the_sinners]

[The child again. Envy had been anything but thrilled to see him, but Scar's interest in homunculus politics only stretches so far. Especially when there's a kid involved who very clearly is only just a kid.]

Those tubes are for your arms. It will keep your warmer, that way.

[He's glad at least one or two people seem to have gotten him things for Christmas.]

private video

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Oh yeah, that conversation. The one that totally went down in flames.]

[Wrath remembers seeing Scar in the background, but Envy's rejection had pretty much dominated his attention for the most part.]

[In any case, he looks a little more cheerful now than he had on the screen when Scar had listened in on Envy talking with him.]</sub>

Well, yeah, but if my arms are in them, I can't tie them around things.

_[DUH.]

[quickattackjack]

Rage...

<sub>[Jack considers this. He can see it! Rage toward a society telling you how you have to wear your sweater! Rage at the world and taking it out on one of the few things you alone can control! Rage fueling a new wave of thinking like coal on a fire!]

[Holly looks up at her trainer's blank face and shoots her brother an unsure glance. The other Skiddo shrugs.]</sub>

Amazing!

[envy_the_sinners]

Why would you want to tie them around things? It's more effective if you wear it properly.

[garbagechild]

--you really think so?

_{[Wrath puffs his scrawny chest out and beams widely, unwittingly flashing his sharky teeth. Having his own style is NEAT! Why had he ever copied Envy to begin with? HMPH. Well, no more!]}

[garbagechild]

<sub>[.... HE DOESN'T REALLY KNOW.]

[He has to think about that for a minute.]

[Did he actually have a reason to tie them around things? Not really. Except for--]</sub>

Tying knots is fun.

_{[There you have it. FROM THE MOUTHS OF BABES.]}

[envy_the_sinners]

[...

Oh, child.]

Well, if you go outside, you should try putting it on like a regular shirt. It will be more comfortable.

[quickattackjack]

Absolutely! You wouldn't mind if my Pokemon and I tried it some time, would you? I wouldn't want to step on anyone's toes!

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

Sure, if you wanna get frostbite. You looking to freeze to death, kid?

[Possibly, yes.]

[garbagechild]

I am outside!

But it's okay! It's like a blanket.

And I made sleeves.

Look.

<sub>[.... He... he's wearing a pair of long woolen stockings on his arms. And he's showing them to the camera.]

[The expression on his face indicates that he's sure Scar will be very impressed with his resourcefulness.]</sub>

[garbagechild]

Wh-- sure!

<sub>[He's had his own style for perhaps twenty minutes and ALREADY somebody likes it enough to copy it! WOW! He must be really good at this style thing!]

[He shoots Mama a look of pure delight, to which she responds by clasping her hands fondly. WHAT A TALENTED TRAINER SHE HAS.]</sub>

[video]

[garbagechild]

No, why would I want that?

Anyway, I have other things for my arms!

<sub>[Which he proudly holds up for Blake to see. ... He's wearing long woolen stockings on his arms. They're big enough that they extend all the way up to his shoulders.]

[... At least he probably won't get frostbite?]</sub>

[envy_the_sinners]

I know that, but...

[Oi.]

If you just wear the clothing as it was intended, it would be much easier to keep warm.

[garbagechild]

But if my arms are covered up anyway, what's the difference?

_{[SCAR YOU ARE QUASHING THE CREATIVE IMPULSES OF A CHILD, YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED.]}

[video]

[lieutenantantichrist]

[Blake examines the kid's face for a while, and finds it guileless.] So nobody's ever taught you sarcasm, either.

[His hand comes up to his forehead.] Those are for your...what were you, raised by wolves?